Soz for not updating this blog for like forever. I focused on karenang.com and then left that to rot too. I’m blaming Facebook because I go there when I post short thoughts on life, depression, politics, memes, etc. I don’t even know if people still read blogs anymore but here I am once again. I guess I have a little bit of motivation to write because I’m feeling a bit rotten. And I have been misdiagnosed for years as having unipolar depression. It wasn’t until February, when I was the most suicidal in my life, when mom forced me to see another psychiatrist. It was Dr. Carlo Banaag and he brought up that most people who have been diagnosed as unipolar aren’t really that. He made me answer a questionnaire and he said that it looks like I am bipolar after all. I don’t have high manias but my lows can go really low. I was the one who suggested that maybe lithium might work on me, not knowing that it is a fucking scary medicine. But I did take them twice a day and wonder of wonders, I stopped being suicidal after day 3. Since lithium worked on me, I guess that means I am indeed bipolar.
I’ve been feeling better ever since I started lithium but I still feel mood dips from time to time. Like when I’m having my period or when I take contraceptive pills to control my menses. That fucking medicine really saved my life.