I went to the 12th Hot Air Balloon Fiesta last Sunday with Phoebe, Jef, Egg, Mark, Patrick, Anthon, Loreyn, Jet, Kate, and our driver Arman. Got sunburned and drained but twas worth it all even if I have to spend a day recuperating. I didn’t have any sleep the night before because my friends came over early and we left at 3am. I wanted to kick them out but it was already too late. Hehe. Click the photo below to get to the album.

Actually, my photos, not me. I entered 4 photos for the Food Tour contest. I think I have a good chance but we’ll see. I’m trying to convince my friends to vote but they need to sign up for a Yehey account first and they’re a bunch of lazies.

Help me win! Vote for my photos at www.yehey.com/promos/trinoma/dementia.html

I’ve never been to Trinoma. Never been to a bloggers’ meet either. I decided to sign up for the Trinoma Bloggers Food Tour when I got wind of the event since I wanted to become more social. Okay, the free food was even more of a big come on I must admit but I also wanted to see other bloggers and people I make “kulit” with on twitter. When I signed up I thought it was already too late since the 100 pax quota was already filled up. I still sent an email though and was delighted when they upped the quota to 150 and I got included. That meant that I could finally meet Shabby, Tess, etc.

The food tour finally pushed through last January 9. I felt a bit awkward since everything was so new to me. I thought I would get lost in the mall and when I finally found the venue, I didn’t see any familiar faces. Kinapalan ko na lang mukha ko and began to chat up with some people there. I think Lauren was the first one I approached. She introduced me to her mom (a blogger too), Fritz, Ade (did I get that correctly?) and Tess.

Tess then introduced me to more bloggers but Yehey (the organizer of the event) started showing the super long Trinoma AVP. After what seemed like 20 minutes, we were told to go to our group because the tour will start. I arrived late so I was assigned to the white group (Shabby was even later than me but she was in the same group). I went to my group and did some chit chat about our blogs, etc. blah blah then off we went.

I finally uploaded the photos I took that night. My write-up about the event will follow…sometime this week. Just click the photo to get to the album.

UP is 100 years old and there will be a kick-off to celebrate its centennial. There kick-off will be on Jan. 8 starting at 4 PM with a parade at the Oblation Plaza then a fireworks display at 10 PM at the ampitheater. So UP peeps and friends, see you there?!

I sent an email to Yehey to include me in the Trinoma blogger food tour. I didn’t receive any replies so I assumed that the quota has been filled. Then I read lordart’s twit that the food tour has been moved. I asked why and he said that some restos want to join in and there’s some reorganization going on. Of course, not those exact words. Anyway, I told him that I don’t think I was accepted but he informed me that I made the list. So yay! Free food is always good. The drawback of being included is that my real name is now revealed for the whole world to know. You win some, you lose some.

FYI, I’ve never been to Trinoma so the tour will be my first time there.

Last Thursday night I treated my staff to a catered party. It was simple. Just food, some booze, and the ever present videoke. I had high expectations because of the things that happened during the surprise party but it wasn’t my day. First, there was the stupid coup d’etat earlier during the day. Next, the awful traffic to and from my appointment with the shrink. Then before the party started, GMA declared a curfew. That didn’t matter though because I didn’t feel like partying much when Bishie brought his girlfriend to the party. That’s right. His girlfriend I’m unusually positive about that fact though. I think that’s the best thing for me since he’s our OJT after all and the fact that we have a 9 year age gap. Don’t get me wrong though. I am still attracted to him but at least now I know that hooking him in is next to impossible.

It’s my birthday today. Ugh. The big 3-Oh. I hate that number. I don’t feel that old yet and my friend said I don’t look 30 so that’s good. Still, I don’t feel like celebrating. I want to save money and there’s really nothing to celebrate.

This birthday isn’t too depressing compared to last year’s. I feel loved now especially since I reconnected with old friends. Of course, it’s not like before when we were younger and have the energy to stay out all night and drink too much booze. I don’t even drink liquor anymore.

A friend was inviting me earlier to go to Baguio this weekend. Maybe going there would do me good but I’m too lazy. I don’t want to travel 4 or more hours just to play cards with them. Besides, they’re all boys and I’ll just be reaffirming my role as one of the boys. That has got to stop but that’s always the case with almost all my male friends. Tsk. Not that I’m interested in any of them in THAT way. Yuck! It’s just depressing when I’m never seen as an object of affection or whatever.  So yeah, one of my birthday wishes is to finally have a love life. I’m not raising my hopes up though.

I consider the time I am with my relatives as the time I’m most myself. Although I don’t spill out my guts to them, tell them my deepest and darkest secrets, nor use expletives in front of them, I still feel like I’m my truest self. No pretentions, no masks, just plain me. Tonight, was my sister and me’s birthday blowout. We invited our close relatives to a buffet dinner at Crowne Plaza Hotel. Some weren’t able to make it and even though that disappointed me, the relatives who were there made up for the others’ absences. I had a good time. We talked about different topics ranging from stock exchange, Rene Saguisag, Hong Kong, Jimmy Kimmel thinking that Filipinos don’t speak/write English, the possibility that my absent cousin might be gay, etc. That’s how we are when we get together.

So when I am with them, my defenses are down. I don’t have to be tough when I’m with them. When I went to the restroom, a young girl and her little sister smirked when they saw me. I ignored them. No. I tried to ignore them but their smirk affected me. I know they were smirking because I’m fat and it hurt. A lot. I quickly washed my hands and left the room but as I was returning to my family, I was teary-eyed. I put on my “tough mask” and got some desserts then went to our table.

Maybe it was just my hormones or maybe I was depressed. I just feel so tired of trying to be tough. I’m tired of pretending that incidents like that don’t affect me. Who would want to be laughed at just because of how they look physically? But I need to be tough for my own good. I need to be tough in order to survive and keep on living. I’m just so goddamn tired of this, that’s all.