I am addicted to masamania. the site really shows the true Japan through the eyes of a Tokyo-ite. it’s sort of refreshing since most of the Japanese blogs I’ve seen offer Japan through rose-tinted lenses. Masa also takes really good photographs which are pleasing to see.
Hah! This is a fun game I saw from guttervomit’s website. Actually it was in his links. Anyway, it’s a flash game called Call Center Charlie which is perfect for the Filipino youth who are being herded into the call center market. I personally wouldn’t apply for a call center job because I find it boring, mind numbing, and a waste of my talents (ehem). The pay is great. Better than my editing jobs even. However, I think it’s a dead end job. But kudos to those who are in (or want to be) in that business. Maybe I would get into it if everything fails…but I doubt it. More likely I would start a call center company of my own if I win the lotto or similar. Enough of this. The game is located here.
boing boing featured a site about how the ratio of iTunes purchase is 21 to an iPOD. The site posed a rhetorical question “where does all the music come from?” Oh come on! Think! Ipod owners have CD collections. I for one have hundreds of CDs which I painstakenly convert to MP3s just to transfer them to my Pod. As of this time, I have barely converted 1/3 of my collection. I live Downhill Battle’s mission but their site fails to account the existing music collection of iPOD owners.
You know you’re having a low day when you cry while eating. Well that happened to me today. my aunt and uncle celebrated their wedding anniversary by treating us to a nice Italian restaurant in Edsa Shangri-la hotel. Everything was fine at first but the discussion suddenly turned to me and my cousin’s carwash business. The oldies suddenly went all huffy because “only my cousin is minding the business”. I have to admit that he does most of the work but I help. Sometimes. Anyway, I became upset and cried silently while they blabbed all throughout dinner. I just felt such a big failure. I know I am. But I find everything too hard these days. Coping is too hard. Even living is too hard sometimes. My therapist said I should do things according to MY standards, not theirs. But I still feel like a failure and I also feel so guilty. They are not aware of my present condition…well I don’t think my mom let them on. I just feel so heavy and I am so ugly and I hate everything. I just want to cut myself again!@! Fuck!
I had my medicine changed. The therapist prescribed fluoxetine, that’s the generic name of Prozac. I told him before that I don’t think Prozac works on me but he said I might be underdosaged. So he said he’ll try this again but with a higher dosage. I told him Prozac is expensive but he told me there’s another alternative in the market which is cheaper. He forgot the brand though. Sheesh. Anyway, mom went to the drugstore looking for the other brand but even Mercury (the leading drug store here) is not aware of it. She was complaining that Prozac is too expensive and wants me to just take 1 a day. I might have to make her talk to my therapist since she clearly doesn’t understand the NEED to take larger amounts. This is so annoying.
I need money. The carwash business is a big flop. I get zero peso from it. Mom still gives me money even though I don’t go to work anymore but somehow I couldn’t seem to pay off my credit card debt. The interest rate just keeps on building up and it’s making me crazy. I don’t think I could ever pay it off. Maybe I can if I withdraw all of my savings from the bank which is quite small to begin with. But I don’t know if that would work since my BPI card is tied up with it. I got my first credit card (the BPI one) approved because I have some savings in their bank so they might freeze the card if I withdraw everything. Gad, I don’t need this problem! I wish I have the life of my cousins since their parents pay all their credit card and other bills. I know that’s insane but I find that very ideal right now. They never have money problems! It’s so unfair.
I’ll shut up now. I’m working myself up again.
This blog sucks!
I can’t wait for the movie version of Rent. I really love that musical. I was able to watch it a couple of years ago when it was staged in the Philippines and it was so fantastic. Of course, the cast weren’t the original ones but the Filipino actors were good. I wish someone would stage that play here again. I will surely watch it.
I can’t wait for the next Tim Burton animation Corpse Bride. I love his works and I’m 99% sure that this movie will be really good. I also can’t wait to see his version of Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. The original version is great and I hope Mr. Burton’s version will do justice to the story. It will be doubly good since Johnny Depp will be in both films. Yay!
In other news…
I started my formal sessions with a psychotherapist this afternoon. I think the doctor is good. He seems very insightful and what I like about him is his wholistic approach. There will be art, dancing, medition, etc. which will accompany the therapy sessions. What I don’t like about it so far is the expense. It costs P1,500 a session which is 3 times the amount I pay for my former psychiatrist. So far, I think it’s worth it because the old doctors just prescribed me drugs and didn’t bother with my actual life. But I guess only time will tell if the sessions are doing me any good.
Your Life Path number is 7.
A Life Path 7 person is a peaceful and affectionate soul, and by nature rather reserved and analytical. The overwhelming strength of the number 7 is reflected in the depth of thinking that is shown; you will garner knowledge from practically every source that you find. Intellectual, scientific and studious, you don’t accept a premise until you have dissected the subject and arrived at you own independent conclusion. This is a very spiritual number and it often denotes a sort of spiritual wisdom that becomes apparent at a fairly early age. You need a good deal of quiet time to be with your own inner thoughts and dreams. You dislike crowds, noise and confusion. You are very thorough and complete in your work, the perfectionist who expects everyone else to be a meet a high standard of performance, too. You evaluate situations very quickly and with amazing accuracy. You rely heavily on your experiences and your intuition, rather than accepting advice from someone; your hunches usually prove to be very accurate, and knowing this, you are one who tends to follow the directions they seem to guide. It’s easy for you to detect deception and recognize insincere people. You aren’t one to have a wide circle of friends, but once you accept someone as a friend, it’s for life. You really aren’t a very social person, and your reserve is often taken to be aloofness. Actually, it’s not that at all, but merely a cover up for your basic feeling of insecurity. You actually like being alone, away from the hustle and bustle of modern life. In many ways, you would have fit in better in much earlier times when the pace of life was less hectic. Read the rest of this entry »
i’ve been eating too much these past few days. i think it’s because of my new medicine. i forgot the name but it’s cheap and is supposed to get rid of depression. my new psychotherapist prescribed it to me since i was complaining about prozac which i think doesn’t work on me anymore. another side effect of the new medicine is sleepiness and dryness of mouth. i’m not feeling any effect from it but it’s not making me more depressed so i guess that’s good. i just don’t like the increase of appetite. i don’t normally eat a lot but now i keep on eating junk food. i don’t like the feeling at all. i’ll tell the doctor to prescribe me a different medicine after my supply runs out.
my internet connection can be so slow sometimes. it’s really getting to be annoying. i’ve been thinking about getting a DSL but the one I have now comes with free cable for tv. i also don’t know if DSL is any better than this.
Dementia Foodista
The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene
